13 Ways to Ease Your NYE Hangover

This holiday season has been a boozefest. The British love a good Christmas party, or five! 

My mouth has tasted the finest wines and the dirtiest jaeger bombs this December and my body has paid for it big time. Wrinkles galore. The next morning it looks like I have fallen out of a Walking Dead episode

walking dead

My eyes are dry, my head is banging and I can’t quite figure out how to answer a text message because my brain is literally not functioning.

….and then……I hear a small whimper from the other room and with a rush of adrenaline I realise, “oh shit I am a mom!”

mom

I am a mom with a hangover. This is the worst possible parenting mistake ever…..actually throwing a baby off Niagra falls is probably the worst parenting mistake ever, but this definitely has to be the second. 

I roll myself out of bed and run into my son’s bedroom to make sure he isn’t stuck between the crib bars or suffocated under a Mickey mouse blanket. Nope. He’s sitting there, looking like an angel, blue eyes blazing at me.

baby photo

“Mom, look how sweet I am, pick me up and play with me.” But the hangover rolls deep within my stomach and fills me with dread. I have to take care of this baby and be hungover. #REALfirstworldproblems

So this New Year’s I thought it would be helpful to give you some personal tips on how to ease a hangover.

1. New years is an anti-climax, don’t go out.

2. Alternate between two paracetamol and baby cuddles every two hours for optimal pain relief. 

cuddle-baby-happy

(look how happy this woman looks, works like a charm)

oc-newborn-photographer

3. Make your drunk self look after your sober self, drink one glass of water for each drink you have. 

4. Watch cute Kitten videos on Youtube.

kittens5. Make sure you have your mom over the next day to watch your child. You want your baby there to give him hugs but you also want your mom there to ensure you don’t have to deal with him when he’s screaming for milk. 

6. Turn off your phone. You don’t want to see those embarrassing photos from last night on Facebook of you dancing on a table and throwing up into a sparkly NYE hat……also, you won’t want to answer any text messages. Meet will be spelled meat WITHOUT autocorrect, and don’t get me started on they’re, there or their,  you are just that stupid right now.  

texts

7. Order pizza right when you wake up. You don’t want to be waiting around crying because you are THAT hungry you are going to die. 

8. Drink water every hour, take little sips (if you gulp it down, you will wee it all out thus reversing any of the hydrating benefits). You don’t want to have a breakthrough headache, especially when the trifecta hits: baby crying, hunger pains, migraine headache.

9. Make sure your boyfriend (or a loved one) is around to hug you whenever you want, but also gives you the distance you need in order to binge on Grey’s Anatomy all day. 

netflix

10. Have a bloody Mary around 1pm to avoid the devastating afternoon breakdown where all the alcohol has left your body and you are in a state.

11. Do NOT by any circumstance change a diaper. 

12. Do not go window shopping at any dog shelters. You will buy one.

13. Do not put on the Santa outfit again in the hope that you will feel more merry. You will only feel fat and not merry. 

santa

33 thoughts on “13 Ways to Ease Your NYE Hangover

  1. Haha this is brilliant! Can we even order Pizza in the morning?! Yes to that! I haven’t been out on NYE in years, even pre-baby we would stay in and have friends over to us for drinks and games – like Murder Mystery- which was good fun. Great tips and totally agree with the Greys Anatomy! #stayclassymama

  2. Brilliant! You bring up many memories of hangovers loooooong past. Thankfully the Mrs. and I have learned well — stay in, pop popcorn, eat ice cream and pizza and watch home alone with the kids. Much more rewarding and palatable during and after the giant anti-climax of New Years Eve! Happy Healthy you #stayclassymama

  3. Ha ha, I just snorted tea out of my nose reading these (thankfully, being a mum, the tea was cold, so no third degree burns). Grandparents are great for a hangover, especially if they take the kids to their house, or better yet, have them for a sleepover!
    #GlobalBlogging

  4. I don’t drink as I’ve never liked the taste but this amused me. Dropping a baby off Niagra falls is definitely a no, no, been there NOT done that. #globalblogging

  5. This is hilarious and I love your GIFs! I can particularly relate to the tip about putting the phone down. I’ve sent a LOT of messages in the past I shouldn’t have. I was actually pretty ok this NYE (part on people….!) BUT my hubby was very worse for wear at his Christmas works party the week before. I started to get worried at one point when he wasn’t home in the wee hours. I did a find my friend look up and it said he was at the house. I opened the front door and there he was. Fast asleep. So no matter how bad your NYE was, you can’t have looked as bad as that LOL #globalblogging

  6. Ok….. nice post 😉 I don’t have so many hangovers anymore, my kid is old enough now. I should have known earlier! 😉
    Have a nice week! #GlobalBlogging

  7. Haha this is brilliant! Wow that happy woman is delirious – what’s that all about?! Great tips, an all year round post if ever I read one 🙂 Interesting about sipping water too…random but I never knew. Thanks for hosting #stayclassymama xx

  8. Oh my word! This is so damn on point it’s hilarious! Hangovers and being a mum do not mix and every mum to be should read this first before ever drinking ever again. Oh that poor Santa – just ouch! #CoolMumClub

  9. Oh man, the hangover films should have brought out an edition: The hangover, with kids. So much material for hilarity. These survival tips just reminded me of the last time I said never again, or the time before that. There will always be a next time, and it doesn’t get any easier!
    Thanks for linking up to #coolmumclub

  10. Eugh, hangover and kids do not mix do they? And yet despite me knowing this extremely well, I still find myself in this awful predicament more times than I should. Some great tips here though. One thing I have learned over the years is to always, always have ibuprofen and/or paracetamol in the house just in case.

    #coolmumclub

  11. Oh my God too funny. That first gif and the woman who’s so happy and the two fat Buddha babies. And yes let’s not discuss they’re, their, there because there are enough of blog posts written by sober people with those avoidable mistakes (but the you are that stupid right now cracked me up!!) Meanwhile I barely had two drinks even on Christmas Day! Very sensible festive period for me. #globalblogging

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