Dear future son,
Please come out now! I have the best milk in the world waiting for you, I have really good nipples, and I promise to wrap you up so tight you won’t even know you’re outside of the womb! There is nice, icy fresh, air out here ready for you to take your first breath (without water), or if that doesn’t tickle your fancy, I can have a bath waiting for you right when you get out so it still feels like you are in the womb?
…what about a hug from your Dad? We have had so much ‘me and you’ time, I’m sure you want to give him a wee snuggle poo? Eh? I can get you the most comfy onesie in the world, with the softest diaper and hire a violinist to come over and play your favourite songs. I’m not sure if you have a favourite song yet, but I’m guessing it will probably be either something by Dr. Dre or Bob Dylan as that is what I’ve been playing for the majority of the pregnancy. Or a combination of both genres? There’s this violinist named Emily Wells that plays hip hop music, here is here version of Juicy by Biggie, I’ll play that for you if I can’t find anyone to personally come to the house.
Your room is ready too! You have a crib, moses basket, twinkly lights and a bouncy chair, what more could you ask for?! Way more fun than being cramped up inside my belly, right?!
I know, I know you will come when it is your time. But it feels like I’m waiting for Christmas knowing that on Christmas day, just before I get to open my present….. I will be punched in the face. So let’s just get it over with already, yea!? : )
On a more serious and cheesy note, I am very excited for you, and so is your Dad, he gets a very big smile on his face whenever we talk about you. It kind of looks like this:
…okay this isn’t the best photo but his happiness here definitely reflects how he feels about you!
So anyway, hopefully you are getting the vibes from my brain waves that I am ready for you! Feel free to come out anytime, I promise I have everything ready and the delicious milk is prepped.
p.s. I’m starting to go crazzzyy! (re: video below)