You’d think as a 27 year old woman, with various degrees, working to become CEO of Google, I would be smarter than a 4 month old. However since the arrival of my son, I feel like he has been controlling my every move. And in reality, he has.

I was reading a post on This Mum’s Life about how she had to out-smart her 2 year old at Superdrug, very funny and offers great advice for any Mum with a toddler. But this got me thinking, while it’s probably much harder with a 2 year old, I’ve found that I have, in a way, had to out-smart my 4 month old.

So, here it goes….

  1. White noise – this makes your baby think they are still in the womb, and in turn, makes them fall asleep
  2. Fake smiling – When you smile, the baby smiles and your whole world feels just a little bit better. So when it is 5:30am playing with rattle toys doesn’t seem THAT BAD.
  3. Bath / Pool – confusing him into thinking the world is now an ocean and he must swim through life
  4. Pram in house – as the only way to get your baby to sleep longer than 30 minutes is to take them outside in the pram, for those nighttime sleeps, bring the pram inside the house. At first, you may feel silly, but after a while you realise, you are a GENIUS. The baby thinks he is outside having a nice, bumpy ride and drifts off into a long slumber.
  5. Swaddling – although I think my son has caught onto this trick as he ferociously kicks the blankets off every single time, it also, tricks the baby into thinking they are still in the womb
  6. Music – turning on “I Will Always Love You” by Whitney Houston on and lip syncing the words, so he thinks your the most beautiful singer in the world
  7. Bouncing – making him think the world has turned into a jigsaw puzzle
  8. Mirror – making the baby think there is another baby in the house to confuse him and stop him from crying
  9. Boob – Just “boob him” into submission, the nipple always wins
  10. Closing your eyes – okay this one might have been a fluke, but I swear if you close your eyes and pretend you are sleeping, the baby will want to sleep too……or maybe I just fell asleep and dreamed that he was sleeping?

Now, how do I get him into thinking the crib is his moses basket?

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